The Plan

You gotta love Robin Williams......Even if he's a little nuts. Leave it to Robin to come up with the perfect plan for our beloved country. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.....

Robin Williams' plan...(Hard to argue with simple no nonsense logic!)

'I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan.'

1) 'The US will apologize to the world for our 'interference' in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good 'ole' boys', we will never 'interfere' again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East , and the Philippines . They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them..

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5) No foreign 'students' over age 21. The older ones are the bombers.. If they don't attend classes, they get a 'D' and it's back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not 'interfere.' They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us 'Ugly Americans' any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH...learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?

'The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' '

Let's get this man a meeting with the President!!!

Nuber Comes to Texas!

My little sister, Julie Ann Tymn-Harrison, came to visit us in Dallas this past week. We had such a blast! She is a go-go-goer, so we went! Enjoy this slide of the cool stuff we did!

PS-I miss my family!!!

OMG!!! Where have I been??

Ahhh life. It just doesn't slow down, does it? Here are a few things we've been doing....

Swimming EVERY DAY

Everything really IS bigger in Texas. We didn't just have a school carnival to end the year, we had a school Renassaince Festival. Hello! School functions of this magnitude here actually profit in the tens of thousands of dollars. Who'd a thunk it? Addy was a awarded a special honor for her entry in the Blanton Renfest writing competition. She got to be a member of the royal court, serving the Queen of Renfest as a Lady in Waiting. She was even knighted! Go Lady Addison!

Just over a month to go!!!

Yes......it's true. I am an insatiable Harry Potter geek and I am totally counting the days until movie 6 comes out (July 15th for those of you wanting to mark your calendars!!!). John makes fun of me on a regular basis so I haven't yet told him that I've officially joined the fan club AND purchased tickets for the London premier. I'm so dressing up in my Gryffindor cape and I'll be flashing my hand whittled replica Harry Potter wand as well. I haven't decided whether or not to wear my radish earrings or lightening bolts...but I'm definitely going with the snitch necklace and trademark Harry Potter glasses. If I can get my hands on a realistic looking Firebolt, I'm definitley going to pack that, too.

Ok, not that big of a Harry Potter geek. But I am excited about the movie! I've loaded my playlist with tracks by this hilarious band called "Harry and the Potters" and I'm going to leave it up for awhile. You don't have to be a fan to enjoy the music cuz it's dang funny.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!

I love being a mom. It's my favorite job in the world. I am so grateful for the opportunity to stay at home with my kids and raise them myself. I feel blessed every day. Cheers to all the stay at home mom's out there! I hope you feel as blessed as I do. The following slideshow is dedicated to Grandma Tymn and Grandma Stevens who do not get to watch first hand their sweet grandbabies grow-up. We miss you, love you, appreciate all you have done for us, and wish you a VERY HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! These photos are courtesy of LeeAnn Widyn, my fabulous friend and professional photographer.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!!!

We can hardly believe our baby girl turned 5 this week! Avery had a very memorable birthday month. Grandma and Grandpa Tymn came all the way from California to celebrate Avery's special day. She adored being doted on and getting extra love and attention from Gma an Gpa for a whole week. Come back you guys!!!

Today, Buddy the horse and his petting zoo friends came to our front yard for a fabulous pony ride and petting zoo party! All the girls dressed like princesses and the boys like knights. They were beyond cute. I can't remember the last time I saw so much squealing, giggling, and jumping up and down. To top off the celebration, Avery's BFF Zaida is sleeping over tonight. They are two peas in a pod and will definitely be trouble when teenagers. Crazy girls.

Enjoy some pix from our fun with my Mom and Dad and Avery's 5th Bday!!!

Confessions of a Harried Housewife, Chapter 4 : Proud Parenting Moments

Life is pretty normal here in Stevensville. We had a wonderful 80 something degree day today and the kids made me heat up the hot tub so they could "swim". They seriously played in that thing for 2 hours! Kids. Aren't they great. So I pledged a few postings back to keep up with the funny things my kids say and I've got a couple of goodies in the last week. The first one stems from John's and My self's desires to enrich our children's lives by introducing them to some classic comedies. Your idea of classic may be a lot different then ours. We are teaching them to appreciate movies like "Goonies", "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure", "Tommy Boy", and 2 of John's personal favorites, "Ace Ventura Pet Detective" 1 and 2. We watched these two last weekend and our kids LOVED them, especially Aidyn who is currently trying to master the ever so sexy Ace Ventura walk. They walk around saying "Bumble-Bee Tuna" and "Shicaca" and "All Righty Then" and most people just look at them strangely. I think to myself, "Ahhh, aren't they precious!".
For those of you who are a little shaky on your Ace Ventura trivia, let me refresh your memory with some brief movie facts: In Ace Ventura 1, Ace is trying to find "Snowflake" the Miami Dolphins team mascot, a live Dolphin, who has been kidnapped. In Ace Ventura 2, Ace travels to Africa to find the missing "Shicaca"-an albino bat that is sacred to a tribe that lives there. While he is searching for the Shicaca (I just love saying that) he follows two suspects to a secret meeting in a fake rhino. Yes, a fake rhino. Ace controls the rhino from inside it's body using levers and buttons and when his cooling fan breaks down, he becomes incredibly hot and sweats like a beast. He takes off ALL his clothes, but it's still not enough-he has to get out of the thing. When he tries to open the door, the handle breaks off, so he desperately goes searching for another exit. He finds a tiny hole in the rhino's behind that stretches open the more he pushes and pulls. As he is pushing and pulling his way out of the rhino's arse, a tour shuttle shows up and a family of four steps out.
Mom says, "Look children! The mother rhino is giving birth!"
Everyone else, "ooooooh, ahhhhhhh, Ohhhhhhhh"
They all watch expectantly for several minutes, first in glorious anticipation and then sort of dumbfounded, and finally completely horrified. The mother and daughter are all but puking when Ace plops out on the ground naked and in the fetal position. The camera switches to the boy (approx age 8-10) and with a huge grin on his face, he yells, "COOL!". Yeah, pretty cool. Aidyn thought so, too! In fact, so much so that the following Monday at school, he shared this special scene with his 2nd grade class during sharing time. So proud! He came home that afternoon and said,
"Guess what mom!" and loving that he wanted to tell me something about his day, I put on my biggest interested mommy smile and replied,
"What bud!" and he said,
"Remember that part in Ace Ventura when Ace is stuck in the rhino and he climbs out through the rhino's butt, and the boy says 'cool'?" I'm thinking in my head-where on earth could this possibly be going-so I say,
"Sure that was funny,....and a little disturbing." And Aidyn says,
"It was 'cool' and I shared that with my class during sharing today!" He is very excited and feeling quite pleased with his successful retelling, I can hear it in his voice. I am feeling a little shocked and at the same time trying my hardest not to laugh uncontrollably. I take a deep breath and calmly say,
"Really, wow. How did Ms. Martin like your story?" Aidyn thought for a minute, and then replied,
"Everyone else laughed pretty hard, but Ms. Martin didn't say anything."
Yeah, surprising. I waited the rest of the afternoon for a call from either Ms. Martin or the principal, but luckily, we were in the clear(:

John is out of town this week and yesterday he called while Avery and I were in the car. I talked to him for a few minutes, Avery talked to him for a few minutes, and then we said bye and hung up. A few seconds later, John calls back but when I answer the call, no one's there. I have a ring set for John's calls so I can tell when he calls without having to look at my caller id. Avery recognized his call tone and said, "Mom, did Daddy's butt just call you?" It was seriously awesome. I love that commercial.

Hope Y'all are well and happy!